How often have I uttered these words? She asks as she tucks her red face into her shirt.
In fact, I said these not lovely words to someone today. I meant them in a loving way. But for some reason it was not seen that way. And more than that, I was probably being borderline…ummm, ugly.
Okay, I am going to come clean here. I want people to get over themselves because, I am not comfortable being in a space that is radiating less than love. I do not want to deal with anger, rage or self-immolation. And all of that belongs to me. I accept that.
But my point is, how often are those words not used in love?
But rather, if you don’t get over yourself, or behave as I want you to, then I will withdraw my love. I am sure we have all had that experience of feeling the conditionality of someone’s love. From parents to lovers to friends, we can feel that subtle, yet so stinging, withdrawal of approval or love.
So what do we mean we when we say get over yourself?
Are we inferring the other is being too self-involved? Or too full of self import? Or pity?
And when did we become the Supreme Court Judge of Getting Over ourselves universe?
CHECKING IN WITH OURSELVES
I realize that when I am in that place of wanting to say get over yourself, it is a reflection of where I am at the moment. If I am feeling impatient with myself, or somewhat frustrated. I think this is when it just, oops, eeks, out of my mouth.
I have also discovered there are many ways that we utter this phrase.
Oh, you do know what I mean. The teasing one, will you just get over yourself?
To the,That IS enough, Get Over Yourself!
And then everywhere in between.
It is our inflection and perhaps our true intention that somehow shows itself. It is just interesting that we think we need to remind others what they probably already know.
TIME OUT FOR ADULTS
Maybe we all need that proverbial time out? Time to figure out why we are judging ourselves or others? And for me it does come down to empathetic patience. If I am understanding what the other is going through, there is no need for anything other than listening.
But how often do I put myself into that frustrated place without realizing that I am the culprit? I am the one that is generating friction. Nope, that cannot be. But yes it is the truth. No matter how badly someone else is behaving. It is their decision to be behave that way. It has absolutely nothing to do with me.
So why do I choose to interfere?
And if I put myself into that space of patience, there is no need to get over anything.
We just somehow navigate that hump.
But if I am in my ego head, oh watch out world! I think I have to counsel everyone out of their predicament. And who needs to hear someone elses opinion of what we know already? How annoying is that?
I think there is default behavior that we all have, wanting to ease and comfort the other. There is this inherent sense of please let me fix you. Because, well maybe I am not doing such a great job with myself.
Oh, such tongue-in-cheek humor of self introspection.
And yes, I know we all do that sometimes.
I do think there are ways I use to make sure I am getting over myself. And I am sure you do too, the certain go to’s for getting over ourselves.
- going for a walk
- distraction, like a ted talk to change our thinking
- doing something creative,
- turn on favorite music and move that body
- oh and the always go to, gratitude
- go for a ride or a drive
What are your ways to get over yourself?
Here is my exercise for when that overwhelming sense of uprising for
those words are coming so close to my lips that they just might erupt. Uh Oh!
First off, take a breath.
Second if worse comes to worse and it is really hard not to say it…pinch an arm. Preferably your own.
Third, take your breath into your heart and ask for peace and compassion.
In this space there is no judgment. There is only the present gift of peace.
In this space, the urge dissipates. Because it is only a story we are holding on to, that ultimately has no impact on what is truly our live living importance.
One way to get into the place of compassionate listening and caring is to try this Morning Ritual Mastery Program.It teaches meditation in a way to start your day with finding peace and abundance.Do click here to change your thoughts every day!
The proverbial “getting over ourselves” is also our mythic version of how we choose to see our ego versus our true self. It is the metaphor of knowing our reflection, when we are not sure of what is exactly showing itself. It is the crossroads of either having a meltdown or an “ahh ha” moment.
And that crossroads is the opening of a gift to self. A way to reframe our own feelings or thoughts that probably just need to be let go of.
And sometimes when we witness others going through this, we can mirror what is happening inside of us. Or that which needs to be attended and addressed.
So next time we find the words, get over yourself, on the tip of our tongues…do consider biting your tongue.
Only kidding, but maybe that is what we all need. Let’s not reward the behavior that is not in our highest self-interest.
But let’s do know that each moment is our trophy of how we can live in our own peace. Yes?
May each moment find your comfort, your peace and smile.
Or just get over yourself. Grin.
Thanks for being here. I am really grateful.
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